[This is part 8 in the RPG Productivity Player’s Guide series.]
One of the most practical ‘tools’ in an RPG, is the ability to create a mule character to help you carry your load. Pack mules can carry way more than a game character ever could, thus helping you store handy, but heavy or seldom-used items.
In real life, there are no pack mules. And I mean this figuratively of course. We all have to carry our own load—unfortunately.
You can interpret ‘load’ in various ways of course, but since this series is about productivity, I’m referring to the number of responsibilities you take on. Whatever you have committed to doing, whatever roles you have accepted, whatever tasks you have agreed to, that’s the load you’re carrying.
So how heavy is your load? Are you doing okay or are you desperate for a packing mule?
Here’s the thing: life is not a sprint. It’s an ultra marathon. And that heavy backpack that didn’t bother you much in the first few miles will become a big burden later on. You have to lighten your load.
Learn to Say No
Here’s the single best way to lighten your load: learn to say no. Those two letters make all the difference, but they can be pretty hard to communicate. So let me share a few tips to make saying no a little easier.
One strategy that made a big difference for me was to make it a habit of never deciding on the spot. If someone asks you to do something, or to take on a certain role or responsibility, never decide right away. Simply say: “I really appreciate you asking me this. I’ll think about it and get back to you within a day.”
Deciding on the spot not only puts you under enormous pressure to say yes, but it also heightens the chance of basing your decision on emotional arguments. The project sounds like fun, it’s an honor to be asked, it’s for the Lord, you really value this person, they’re finally seeing your potential, you name it. All emotional reasons to say yes, instead of rational ones.
When you create that time buffer, it allows you to switch from your emotions to your rational thinking and really see all the pros and cons of saying yes. You may still decide to do it, but at least you will have thought it through and you’re aware of the consequences.
Something’s Gotta Give
The second piece of advice I want to share is this: every time you say no to a new responsibility, make sure you get rid of another. Unless you have enough free time on your hands, but that’s seldom the case.
If there’s one area where the power of positive thinking does not work, it’s in this. You cannot cram more work into the same amount of hours, no matter how much you want it to fit. We all know that, yet we keep fooling ourselves that we’ll somehow make it work. There are no packing mules: you have to carry this load.
If your schedule is already full, you cannot accept more work without getting rid of something else. If you don’t, you’ll end up stressed and seriously burnt out, or your loved ones will pay the price. So before accepting a task, decide what has to go to make room for this one.
Focus, Focus, Focus
I’ve said it before in this series, but it bears repeating: in lightening your load, keep the right focus. Focus on what you’re good at, where you can make a difference. Focus on what aligns with your deepest passions, talents, and gifts. Focus on what needs to be your priority, like your family, your relationship with God. Don’t ever sacrifice those.
If you feel like your load is to heavy, but you have no idea where to start cutting back, read our short series on New Years Goals and how to execute these. It may help you set new priorities and focus on those.
Eric Dye says
I’m still chewing on this a week later. I think I need to lighten my load. Because no mule.
Rachel Blom says
This is one of the biggest things I’ve changed in the last few years. I’ve become much better at saying no and focusing on those things that should be a priority to me. By nature, I love saying ‘yes’, but you just can’t. Ultimately, I serve no one by agreeing to take on too many responsibilities, especially not myself and my family.
So yes, lighten your load. Focus on those things where you know you are called to make a difference. Anything else will have to go…