There was a time when if someone had a problem with you or something you did, they told you about it and you both dealt with whatever it was like adults. Then, as society progressed, people stopped being so blunt with each other and preferred the method of talking behind your back and having the problem eventually get back to you through some mutual friend or colleague. That was always a cause for concern, because now more people had been brought in on the situation, and news of the problem had spread outside of those directly involved.
These days, though, it’s gotten all the more worse, as people vent their frustrations in whole new ways, using whole new mediums that often times could have a lot more negative effects than talking behind your back ever could.
Social media and blogs have become the new diary for many people, who see the need to post their innermost thoughts that were once reserved for a locked book away from prying eyes, to a now, often times, public confession or rant about their latest quarrel or complaint.
People put their lives on Facebook – including the one thing that we still have the true power to have control over and keep for ourselves, but is one of the first things Facebook asks for: “what’s on your mind?”
So what should a Church, ministry, or individual in leadership within a Church or ministry, do when someone decides to go all Anne Frank about their latest teaching, decision, method or action?
There are a couple of things to keep in mind:
Revenge isn’t the answer
Often times people can be cruel. If someone has been hurt, there’s no telling what they’ll say. Keep in mind that they probably aren’t thinking straight and what’s coming out of them isn’t genuine, thought out rhetoric, but rather off-the-cuff venting nonsense that even they themselves will regret later.
Even if it is genuine, though, seeking revenge isn’t the answer. The Bible says in Romans 12:19:
“Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord.”
God commands us not to retaliate – as hard as it is. Like Jesus said, we should turn the other cheek (Matthew 5:39) and let God deal with them whatever way He sees fit.
Rejoice in your persecution
It might sound strange, but we should actually be happy that we’re facing some negativity toward the work we’re doing for the Kingdom.
When we think of what happens in the world to people of faith, persecution might sound like too strong a word to use when referring to a Facebook post – but in fact, it really isn’t.
“Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you.” (Matthew 5:12)
The early Church didn’t have social media but they were certainly talked about in negative ways.
We’re comforted to know that when people talk negative about us, we shouldn’t necessarily take it as a bad thing – because at least they’re paying attention to what we’re saying and doing.
Have you ever been attacked on social media? How did you react?
[Images via abolotnov & Andrew_Nielsen]
Karen Rainwater says
I have been sworn at through Twitter because of my stance on same sex “marriage”. I believe in true Biblical marriage… one man/one woman, and I stand up for that on Twitter and elsewhere. I have been sworn at and challenged on my belief. In the case of simple name calling attacks, I just ignore and sometimes block the tweeter. But, even if the challenge isn’t the nicest, but actually contains some questioning, some actual conversation, then I respond, as respectfully and calmly as I hope I do all the time. I don’t feel upset, so it isn’t that difficult to stay calm. I tend to be more upset if I feel I’ve done something wrong in the eyes of God. Otherwise, I know that the attacks or challenges aren’t about me at all.
I am not a minister. I am simply a Christian, wife, mom, and artist, that posts on Twitter and Facebook. 🙂
Rudy Norman says
Thanks for the comment.
You’re right – responding to the person in love is a great way to downplay the original attack as well. Sometimes people actually have good things to say but just say them in the wrong way. Getting down to the point of their message, you’ll often find these attackers are still people and aren’t out to hurt for the sake of hurting.
Eleanor says
Criticisms of a ministry on social media can be such a distraction. There’s an anonymity factor that seems to bring out the worst in people. I can’t remember who said it, or their exact words, but I always think “whenever I’m feeling too good about humanity, I go read comments on YouTube.”
That said, one of the real benefits of having a private social media community is that you know everyone who’s there, and you just don’t get that kind of anonymous nastiness.
(Full disclosure, I work for ACS Technologies, which owns the private social network for churches, The City. But I wouldn’t mention it if I didn’t believe in it.)
Rudy Norman says
You’re right Eleanor, sometimes attacks can be distractions – but the key is to not let it get to us to the point where it hinders the work we’re trying to do.
While private social media communities have a very important place in some ministries and also have their benefits outside of traditional social media, I don’t think we should be seeking to abolish using public social media altogether because some criticism comes our way.
Paul Juby says
Is it possible that we could use an attack on a ministry as a time for conversation, possibly persuasion? If someone attacks a ministry, and they are then involved in a clear and intelligent conversation, they may be able to see the other side of their argument. Maybe it is another aspect of rejoicing in the persecution.
Rudy Norman says
Is a criticism an attack?
You’re right that if a person is merely criticizing something in a ministry, they’re likely open to discussion and reason. However if bitterness and dare I say hatred has caused someone to release a vicious attack on you for no obvious reason, then that’s different in my eyes.
Jonathan Assink says
Don’t feed the trolls.
Eric Dye says
THIS.