If you’ve ever worked tech support or as a church tech volunteer or even as the “go-to” tech guy at your office or in your family, you’ve likely had some frustrating support encounters.
Hopefully, in those moments, you’ve been able to have some fun.
Here is a non-scientific listing of great tech jokes and wisecracks.
- “I think this is an ID Ten-T error.” (ID Ten-T = ID 10 T = IDIOT)
- “I wish I could CTL-ALT-DEL your attitude.” (I used to have this on a t-shirt, though now, I’d need it to say “CMD-SHIFT-ESC.”)
- “Stop replying all instead of replying to sender, or I’ll be forced to forward my fist to your face.”
- “I found the problem. It’s PEBKAC: Problem Exists Between Keyboard And Chair.” (Sean Lacy, @GeekAthair)
- “Sometimes, I dream of being able to uninstall and reinstall your face.”
- In response to ridiculous support tickets, “On a scale of 1 to 10, how did you click?” (Sean Lacy)
- “Don’t worry. They are working on a software patch for user error.”
- “Ok, here’s how to fix the problem. Turn off your computer. Now, put your head down on your desk and never call me about our your caps lock again.”
- “My software never has bugs. It just develops random features.” (Sean Lacy)
- “You’re jokes are like Flash: obnoxious, largely unsupported, and yet mysteriously still around.”
What would you add to the list?
If we pick your joke/wisecrack for the one of the two remaining spots, we’ll give you a shout-out on Twitter and on the ChurchMag Podcast. Then, we’ll let the Internet pick the best of these two, with the writer of the best joke getting a free ChurchMag mug!
Mike Howard says
The problem is a loose nut behind the keyboard.
Phil Schneider says
Boom!
Gregory McKinnell says
Ones that spring to mind…
– Hello IT, have to you tried turning it off and back on again? (From The IT Crowd).
– There are 10 types of people in the world. Those that understand binary and those that cant.
– To err is human but to really stuff things up, you need a computer.
– To err is human – and to blame it on a computer is even more so.
– I don’t always test my code, but when I do, I do it in production.
– Programmer: an organism capable of turning caffeine into code.
Phil Schneider says
So very good! Thanks!
Sean Walker says
When we had a new tech come up with a problem that was easy to fix, we’d tell them, It’s probably an I/O problem.” I/O standing for “Idiot Operator” of course. Then when they’d worked around me long enough, they could throw it back in my face when I goofed up something simple. They loved having an inside joke to haze me with.